Wednesday, April 7, 2010

relationship rules i think are bogus.


Being in a relationship is one of the joys of life.  It's wonderful to have someone to count on, and love on, and do fun things with.  It can be hard though with friends, family, the internet, and the media telling you what relationships are supposed to be like and how you and your partner are supposed to act.  How do you know who to listen to?  My advice?  Listen, but just do what works for you!  Here are some "relationship rules" I've been told that (in my opinion) are NOT to be listened to:


Rule: Relationships are hard work.

Really: The problem with this rule is not so much the rule itself, but the interpretation.  Sure, relationships take work.  Both people need to be engaged and active in relationship.  There needs to be compromise.  Both people need to work to grow together and keep the relationship alive.  This is all work.  But where some people go wrong is they use this rule as an excuse when the relationship really shouldn't keep going.  Lack of communication, lives going in different directions, excessive arguing, and even worse, emotional or physical violence are all signs that really, something isn't working; not that you're not working hard enough.  Try and look at your relationship honestly.  If it feels like pulling teeth to just talk with your significant other, or if everything turns into an argument, the relationship is probably not a healthy one for you.  And when you find one that is, you'll see that while it will take some work, it won't feel like it because you'll be doing it together.

Better Rule: Be active in your relationship.

****

Rule: Arguing is good for a relationship.

Really: Discussing is good.  Fighting all the time is not good.  Not to say an argument now and again isn't normal, because it is, but that's not what I'm referring to. Again, I see this rule used as an excuse.  I've heard many a lady say, "We fight a lot, but arguing is good for a relationship."  Um, not everyday, or anytime you don't share the same opinion.  That's a bigger problem.  Communication is one of the most important things in a relationship.  Learn how to communicate with your partner so a simple difference in opinion doesn't turn into a fight.  And bonus!  With good communication, you can actually work problems out, instead of creating more. 

Better Rule: Communicate effectively in your relationship.

****

Rule: Never go to bed angry.

Really:  Okay, nobody likes to go to bed angry but come on.  Dragging an argument out until all hours of the night just to follow this rule will only make things worse.  I promise.  If you have a big argument and it's nearly time for bed, call a truce for the night and continue the discussion the next day.  Not only will this give both of you time to calm down, but sleep can clear your head and help you think about the problem in a better way.

Better Rule: Try not to go to bed angry, but if it's bedtime, call a truce and finish the discussion the next day.

****
What relationship rules do you not buy into?

P.S. To the boyfriend-You're the reason I understand why these rules aren't good ones to follow.  Thank you. XO

Tuesday, April 6, 2010

hyperbole and a half.

banner from Hyperbole and a Half, as I'm sure you guessed.

I've recently found the blog Hyperbole and a Half and I think the writer maaaaay be my soul sister.  She uses words like "pokey" and "crawly" to explain feeling sick.  Hello!  She's speaking my language!  She despises creepy crawlies (death to spiders).  And best of all, she draws hilarious, hilarious pictures.  Here's an example.  My reading of her blog may borderline obsession.  I get the shakes if she doesn't post, and when she does post?  Oh man, the excitement is unreal.  Seriously, check it out.  I want you to get addicted too.

Monday, April 5, 2010

wandering.


I'm a wanderer by nature.  Because of this, I'm always daydreaming of places I'll someday visit, and adventures I'll one day have.  And while that's all good and fun, sometimes I need to remember to stop daydreaming and just be here.  Because really, there is no place I'd rather be. :)

Sunday, April 4, 2010

happy easter, friends.


I hope your day is filled with friends, family, and jelly beans.  

Mine is going to be filled with triple ginger cookies (which is the best way to fill a day, I assure you).

Happy Easter!

Thursday, April 1, 2010

alright snow, you win.


The weather has played an April Fool's trick on Laramie.  Forget about those pesky weather reports that predicted today's white stuff; nobody pays attention to those anymore. 

Yesterday's scene:

Weather: Warmish and springy! 
Clothing on me: Dress, tights and converse sneakers. 
Sleeping arrangements: Slept at the boyfriends.

Today's scene:

Weather: FOUR INCHES OF COLD, WET SNOW.  Wtf weather! 
Clothing on me: Still in a dress, tights and converse sneakers.  NOT appropriate clothing for snow.
Morning situation:  Woke up late (as usual), so I rushed outside, in my innappropriate spring clothing, heaved the snow off my car using my muscles, drove to my place, showered, put on appropriate, dumb, winter clothing, and got to work late (again, as usual). 

So the snow didn't change my schedule too much, but it did make me look silly for 5 minutes while I was outside in a dress (who is that crazy woman?!) and it soaked my poor little shoes.  But now I'm eating homemade bread pudding so it's alright. 

Either way, good one snow.  You certainly fooled me.

happy april fool's day!

photo by Scott Ableman

Now that I'm getting ancient (haha) I'm not much of a prankster anymore, but when my siblings and I were younger we lived for April Fools Day!  We had so much fun saran wrapping the toilet, dying the milk blue, tying doors shut, plus lots-o-other tricks.  I'm sure it drove our parents crazy but that's what they holiday is for, non?  What trick did you pull this year?  What pranks did you pull as a kid?
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